I’ll probably keep this article short and sweet, not because I don’t want to write but because I’m in incredible amounts of pain right now. I’ve already been to the hospital FOUR times this quarter alone and it’s pissing me off. Y’all know me though, I’m physically incapable of giving up :D, those words don’t exist in my vocabulary.
Today I woke up for school and I was all happy that it was Friday and ready for the listening portion of my test in Spanish (it’s chapter 3 and we’re already halfway through chapter 4 I fucking hate being this behind). Unfortunately when I woke up I had a massive pain in my gut that never went away and is still here now, I missed school, my tests, couldn’t do any work earlier, missed the date I was supposed to go on tonight and almost missed my doctor’s appointment. Oh yeah and apparently they have to cut the cyst bump thingy off my face on December 2nd……… It’ll leave a fairly big scar….. yay……. That’s alright though hopefully it’s not big enough to end my modeling career but looks tuff enough that I can play it off as a badass or something (just kidding I’d never lie about my wounds, but I’d love a dope looking tuff scar, I mean ladies dig scars right?)
Anyway I’m also kind of annoyed with the fact that people aren’t very straight up with me (speaking as an especially blunt person). Just because I’m sick doesn’t mean I’m fragile and going to explode into a thousand pieces if a girl doesn’t like me -_-, just as you guys are playing the field I’m not in a relationship and I’m doing the same thing! Hell if I found my special somebody I’d totally lock her down but I’m 99.9% that doesn’t exist lol. It just grinds my gears that a lot of the girls in my Social Circle (or around school/work whatever) can’t be straight up and just tell me they aren’t interested (but they’ll be much more vocal about rejecting other guys, like… you guys don’t need to treat me different just because I have medical issues). They have to go around in circles and flake etc. until I call them out on it, which I really don’t enjoy doing but I will always call people out on their bullshit.
BLURGH, it just bugs me that it seems a lot of women feel they have to let me down easy because I’m sick, hell even my male friends are starting to treat me with kid gloves. I’ll have you lot know I’m still tough as nails! I don’t need anyone to baby me, understanding my issues does not mean “babying me” there is a difference!
Anyway I was quite happy about some things today, TheMighty.com published another one of my articles :D, (https://themighty.com/2016/11/how-to-love-a-guy-with-anxiety/). Please give it a LIKE and a SHARE if you enjoy it! Also I will be getting featured on another website very soon which I’m excited to share with you all! Lastly even though I auditioned for a supporting role in this TV Commercial coming up…. The Director’s MAY WANT ME for the Lead Role! Who would have thought eh? They thought I’d do better there, so we’ll see whether I get it or not but my gut says it shall be :D.
Thank you all for the support, it’s hard going through this and sometimes I feel incredibly alone… I’m going to make it though, I don’t know the meaning of the phrase “give up”, I really don’t. I may not have someone special by my side which makes it a bit harder (as well as feeling like I’ll never find that), but hell you know what? I’ll be my special someone! I’ll be in love with Saleem, look in the mirror and be like “you sexy boy ;)”, ok not really that’s weird…. I’m signing off before these pain pills turn me into a nut hahaha.